'X'

On Monday in my Educational Foundations class the topic of the day was bullying. But instead of just discussing how bullying impacts students, we watched a documentary about a boy who was bullied and tormented all through middle school and high school for being gay, his experiences, and how he successfully sued the school for failing to protect him. It was incredibly powerful and emotional to watch. After it ended, our class of 40 was absolutely silent for a few moments. Then our professor put up a collage of teenagers' pictures on the board, telling us that although some students have a happy ending to their story, others see no way out and commit suicide.

This led to the discussion of what causes someone so young to take their own life. We had to do an exercise where we wrote down the top five things in life that are most important to us. Then our professor told us to imagine that something tragic had happened, so now we had to cross out one...which do you choose? We kept going through this process until it got down to only having one item on the list left. It may sound like a simple task, but in the moment with all the emotions it was incredibly intense. Trying to comprehend what I would do with my life if I ONLY had my family...I crossed out my education, my home, my friends, David...just family left. And then we were forced to cross out the last one...it was so hard putting an 'X' through 'My Family.' I was completely emotionally drained.

We connected the activity to what happens to students who feel like they're losing control of everything in life and like they have nothing important left to live for...how they end up deciding that suicide is the best option.

It was not a fun class at all. But it was completely necessary and incredibly moving. I think, and hope, that when I'm a teacher (and even now as a student) I'll be able to recognize bullying and reach out to those involved, be a friend and provide a reason to stay alive.

THE WALKING DEAD (Float Photos)

Yay parade!

We had some people get really intense with their costumes/makeup!

My absolute favorite picture I took. I was standing on a table and all the 'walkers' surrounded me. I love how the hand is the only thing in focus and everything else is a freakish blur!

Paul as Rick!

My wonderful fantastic roommate, Jordan, getting her zombie makeup done!

L to R: Dead Lori (ME!!!), Beth, Pregnant Lori, Rick (MY BFF PAUL!!!), Andrea, Shane, Merle, The Governor, Daryl, Clementine (from the video game)

Homecoming Parade!

THE HOMECOMING PARADE WAS SO MUCH FUN.

As the HCSA Special Events Chair, I was completely responsible for organizing the Honors College float for the Homecoming Parade. Which meant coming up with a theme...creating a float...finding a trailer...finding a van...finding someone to drive it...keeping track of parade attendance...buying candy...buying makeup...SO MUCH RESPONSIBILITY AND STRESS. BLEGH.

So up to today, the whole parade thing was just this big ball of stress that had to be dealt with. But doing the actual parade was AWESOME.

The theme was The Walking Dead, and so about 10 people were actual characters from the show (I WAS DEAD LORI!) and everyone else (maybe 20 or more people?) was a zombie! And we went all out with the ripped up clothing...fake blood...gore...skin peeling off...dark circles...detached limbs...livers...hearts...brains..guts...it was beautifully hideous.

And the whole time we're doing the parade, we had the creepy soundtrack of The Walking Dead blasting from the van! And there'd be fight sequences and screaming and zombies moaning and growling...oh my word it was awesome.

PICTURES TO BE POSTED SHORTLY!

Yay Monday!

I may possibly have just had the best Monday of my life.

David slept over Sunday night, so I got to fall asleep and wake up with him.
I made delicious veggies omelettes for us for breakfast.
We got to chill most of the morning and have just us time.
Then we went to PF Chang's and had A PHENOMENAL LUNCH.
Then to the movies! We saw "Gravity." Oh my word. Amazing experience.
After that I drove to my dad's house (and avoided traffic by taking the back roads!).
Had a yummy dinner of gluten free burritos and homemade guacamole.
Watched TV and bonded as a family.
Ate delicious lactose-free ice cream with raspberries and dark chocolate.
Played video games with my brother.
And now I get to go to bed with the knowledge that I have another day off of school tomorrow!
Fantastic Monday!

BOO BOSTON!

So I'm kinda totally bummed out.

After my amazing experience last season with the Reading Buccaneers, I was so pumped to go audition for a DCI corps. I loved Bucs, but I was ready to take it to the next level.

I had my heart set on auditioning with the Boston Crusaders, but when I emailed them to ask if they'd be able to provide for my gluten/lactose-free dietary needs, they said no. Which means they're just not an option anymore.

BLEGH.

So now it's decision time...go back to Bucs for another year to get more experience? Audition somewhere else? Cadets? Bluecoats? Such turmoil! Can't figure out what I want to do...but in the meantime I'll just keep practicing. No matter what, I'll be marching somewhere this summer.

"Standard Time"

This year, I am the Special Events Chair of the Honors College Student Association at Millersville University (wow that's a mouthful!). One of the events I planned for this month was a trip to the Fulton Theater (an opera house) in Lancaster to see the dance musical "Standard Time." IT WAS PHENOMENAL.

The production is all of these professional dancers and singers (who have incredible Broadway experience) coming together for a show choreographed by Mark Stuart. There's no lines in it at all...it's just dance and music, but it was so incredibly moving.

The first movement was set in the 1938s and focused on a guy who shined shoes for a living and followed his experiences of trying to get a job, working in a hotel, and falling for one of the rich heiresses living there. The music was GREAT cause it was all stuff taken from that era, and the dancing was really old-fashioned as well. It was entertaining, comedic, and also thought-provoking with the issue of class difference being examined. Another cool aspect of it was the two main characters, the guy shining shoes and the heiress he falls far, were the only ones wearing red. All the other dancers/singers involved were in some variation of black. So those two really stood.

The next movement took place in the 1968 and followed the story of an interracial couple trying to be together though their friends tore them apart. It took place in a jazz club (THE MUSIC WAS ROCKING!) and was very West Side Story-esque. Two groups...one a mix of African-American/Latino/Asian (representing different races) and the other all Caucasians. They had dance-offs, singers competed to show off who was better, and then it all led up to this ballad where the lights dimmed, and the only focus was on a white girl and a black guy (both dressed in red...see the trend?) who had been noticing each other all night. They danced together, BUT WITHOUT TOUCHING. It was absolutely beautiful to watch, really emotionally effective choreography. After a few minutes, they finally held hands...something so incredibly simple but holding so much meaning after dancing for so long with no physical contact, but then the music went nuts and the lights went nuts and the friends from each side started fighting each other and pulling hair and throwing punches and one of the white guys got out a knife and through all the ruckus, the featured girl got stabbed. And then the curtain went down. That was the end. We were all sitting there with our jaws dropped. So much emotional build up and such an abrupt ending...ridiculously powerful.

The third movement took place in 2008, and it was my absolute favorite one. The music was all modern (there were songs by Adele, One Republic, Sara Bareilles, etc.) but all done in new styles...ah! So good! It opened with a guy in a red tank top surrounded by the rest of the cast, all in black hoodies and black pants, and it was just madness and chaos. And at the end of his feature, another guy in a red tank top walked across the stage...which piqued everyone's curiosity because in each movement, the ones in red always ended up as being the couple. Then there was a transition and a girl in a red dress came on stage and she danced a BEAUTIFUL solo with a man dressed in black to the song "Gravity" (Sara Bareilles)...but at the end of it, the girl was alone and you got the message that her love had passed away. The next scene was at a bar and a big dance scene with all sorts of couples...lesbians...interracial...and then the girl in red showed up but she was with a different man. Their dance was all about being in an abusive relationship...it was so moving and powerful. Ridiculously fast choreography...her being tugged and thrown all across the stage...it ended with the man throwing her down on the ground and leaving her. The music stopped and all you could hear was her sobbing. Then the man from the beginning with the red tank top helped pick her up, showed her a new way to dance/be in a relationship, and they got married. After the next transition, he was still in his red tank top but she had changed into black shorts, a black sports bra, and a cardigan and the scene was them living together at home. We saw their daily routine of going to bed together, waking up and brushing teeth, eating breakfast, then going to work. It went through that pattern three or four times, and each time you could tell the man wasn't as happy as he was before. At one point, the second man in the red tank (from the first scene) came into the house and the two of them danced and the wife came in and saw them, then she ran out crying. Then it was all this craziness of the stage being split and the two men dancing together and figuring out their relationship while the girl worked through her pain...but by the end, they all found peace. She accepted her husband's sexual orientation and let him go be with the other man, and the husband finally was in a fulfilling relationship. I cried so hard, because that's pretty much the storyline of my parents. And I absolutely LOVED how they conveyed the story...neither of them was a bad guy. It was clear the man wasn't happy and not with who he was supposed to be with. But it was also clear the woman was torn up and struggled to be okay, but she eventually found acceptance. I was sobbing. Thinking of my mom...my dad...the struggle for both of them and the amazing resolution that now my family is completely at peace with everything that happened and I couldn't imagine life any other way.

The dance musical ended with an awesome feel good song with joyful dancing (there's no other way to describe it) and celebration, and then a short feature at the end with all the three couples that had been the focus from the different time periods. It was amazing. When it came to the curtain call, I stood up the fastest I ever have for any performance.

What the choreographer and those dancers/singers did was astounding. It was so thought-provoking and emotionally powerful...without one word ever being spoken.

Short clip from one of the musical's workshops: http://www.thefulton.org/standard-time/

Big Lips?

Saturday night, David and I were lounging in my dorm room on my couch (IT IS THE BEST COLLEGE COUCH EVA! Hideous, compact, and comfy!) just talking about random stuff and he was looking at me at one point and offhandedly commented, "You have a really small mouth." Immediately, I was offended. I told him that's a terrible thing to say to a girl, it's like telling a guy his junk is really small. He couldn't comprehend what I meant, saying he thought he was complementing me. So then this started this whole discussion of the "idealness" of women with big lips...

I think females with big lips are super attractive. And using the ridiculous illogical logic that society has taught me, my brain goes like this: She's really hot. She has big lips. My lips are small. That must mean I'm not pretty.

Boom. Irrational. Terrible. Nonsense. But it's totally the way my mind works.

I showed David pictures of Penelope Cruz, Emily Ratajkowski...and he just shook his head and said their lips look silly and fake and he doesn't find it appealing at all. I told him he was nuts.

But then he made a point that I had never thought of before: "If your lips were as big as theirs, it wouldn't go right with the rest of your face. Your proportions are perfect the way they are."

Woah. That sort of makes sense. I kind of hate my lips a little less now...

The whole conversation got me thinking about how crazy it is that we all compare ourselves to celebrities, models, our friends, etc. and use their facial features to judge our own. We watch tutorials on youtube to try to copy the way Nina Dobrev does her makeup...how riannstar does her hair...how Lauren Conrad shapes her eyebrows...but they're doing what's best for THEIR faces. Who's to say that I would look so much better copying celebrities? What if, instead, I focused on my best features and owned them as being my own?

Food for thought.